Back - Phew!

I have been out for quite a while, which my non existent readers wouldn't have noticed.

Well back to the point - The voting you see below has closed, a long time back! Banner 5 won, Duh!

Thanks to people who have voted, Amit, Girish, Pushpak and relatives!

TMH Banners!

All right - No more long and boring reviews which are longer than the movie!


How about a poll on which was the best TMH (That would be - The Morning Haha) banner! Incidentally, all of these photos were clicked at different places. Not by design really! Click on the photos to see a larger image.

Banner I: My first banner! I clicked this photo of a crossing in Mumbai. The traffic blurs made it interesting.

Banner II: This was a close up of the bar at my home in Pune. 

Banner III: I non-violently shot this pigeon on a platform at a random station in London.

Banner IV: I shot this flower in Bhandardara. (A quaint town, on the banks of a large lake, near Pune) The wind was strong, which explains the motion blur. 

Banner V: I clicked this 'photo' from an apartment in Kolkata, on the 22nd floor. I used panorama perfect lite to  stitch a couple of photos together to create this panorama. Also added the film grains myself.


Now use the voting buttons on the right hand-side of this post to choose your favorite! I will acknowledge everyone who voted for the most popular banner in my next post!

Life Partner - The reluctant review!

Spoiler Warning – If you have spent hard earned money to see this movie, I would call you the 2^nd most dumb person on this planet. Dumbest being, yours truly, who spent to watch this atrocity and is now blogging about it. If you haven’t seen this, I would urge you read this post instead! All plot bumps and potholes have been revealed.

Like the movie, let me do a bit of character development.

Hero #1: Vertically challenged, dark and effeminate star kid; he plays the role of an orthodox Gujarati boy, whose objective in life is to get married. You admire the single mindedness of this character. We movie goers usually think about a couple of other things, like breathing and eating, not this bloke.

Dysfunctional Dad: An uber-othrodox Gujarati and dad of Hero #1, he maintains a strict regime of oily hair-dos and oilier breakfast in his family. Streaks of Utpal Dutt from Golmaal appear in this character, in the way he protects his manliness, aka his moustache.

Hero #2: Not vertically challenged, not dark and effeminate star kid; he plays the role of a banker, who drives a Maserati convertible and gets promotions on a daily basis without working.

Hero #3: Actor-turned-MP-turned-Actor, fighting the battle of the bulge, double-chins, dark-circles and other thingamajigs, plays the role of a Super - Divorce Lawyer. He usually does song and dance routines, when he is not peddling divorces.

Now onto the story! For the first time in history of blogging has any blogger gone so far, revealing the entire story of a movie. Hold your breath!

Act I – Opens with Hero #2 driving his Maserati on an airport runway. In the car are his girlfriend and Hero #1.

Hero #2: Let’s overtake this plane so that I can kiss my girlfriend!

Hero #1: Don’t you have office tomorrow?

Hero #2: No, they gave me a promotion. (Song and Dance follows).

Hero #1: Then let’s go to Gujarat and get married?

Hero #2: Ok. (Marriages, more songs and dances follow)

Act II – Opens with Dysfunctional Dad reprimanding his daughter-in-law for commenting on a stock price.

Dysfunctional Dad: So what, if you have a degree from IIM Ahmedabad? Waiters here in Cape Town have degrees from IIM Ahmedabad. (Score: Life Partner 1; IIM A: 0)

Wife of Hero #1: Do not insult my father! (Hero #1 promptly gives her one-tight-slap!)

Hero #2 to his wife: I am sick of doing all the donkey-work, washing clothes and cleaning potties! Why don’t you do something?

Wife of Hero #2: Who does all the partying around here? Hah? Who? Answer that!

Hero #3: I can see business coming my way! (Divorces, sad songs and item numbers follow)

Act III – Opens with Hero #3 getting married. Please refer to item number for Hero #3’s love story.

Wife of Hero #2: I will blow everyone here at this marriage party. (With a bomb strapped to her, of course!)

Dysfunctional Dad: My eyes are opened, forgive me son (Hero #1)!

Hero #1 to his wife: Quick marry me before she blows us up! (Wife from IIM A agrees!) (Score: Life Partner 2; IIM A: 0)

Hero #2 to his wife (Who is threatening to blow everyone!): Ok I will do the donkey-work! (Wife drops the bomb and marries Hero #2!)

The End!

You can start breathing now!

Captures from Singapore

Vantage Point

Urban Sunset

Stroll by the river

Jump

Reflections?

My favorite snowy movies

These are the movies which make you feel colder in a warm and fuzzy kind of a way! Makes you wish you had a fireplace. These are the choicest, the best snowy movies that will leave your teeth chattering! The following list is in reverse order of preference.

• Vertical Limit

Snow capped mountains and mountains of editing errors, make for good watching. Watch out for the boom mikes. A few laughs are always good.

• Cliffhanger

Another movie featuring snow capped mountains and an action packed thriller.

• Home Alone

A movie that gives you the tickles. You begin to feel sorry for the bad guys in the end, and cold!

• Doctor Zhivago

A classic, what can I say, one of the best movies ever.

• Ice Age

Even though this is an animated movie, the storyline, the characters and the setting all come together fantastically.

• Fargo

This movie is 30 degrees below zero. Add crime to the mix and you have potent combination. A must watch, curl up in a quilt and set the air conditioner on high for best effects!

• Transsiberian

This movie will chill you to the bone. Exotic locales, trains, crime, suspense and tons of snow. A combination that can rarely be beaten. This would end up being one of my favorite train movies as well. Look out for that list!

These are the movies that you would watch if the summer in Delhi is getting too hot to handle or if you are in the mood to travel to Siberia without getting nasty frost bites! Let me know if there are other movies which you think should be on the list.

Pune to Bhandardara (Driving directions)

When I planned a vacation in Bhandardara, little did I know that there would be no internet resources on how to get there! I found no help articles or posts on the internet telling you how to drive to Bhandardara from Pune. So this is my good deed for the day!

Bhandardara is town perched on a hill-top, about 210 kms from Pune. There is a dam and a lot of nature for you to admire. The maps I had downloaded from the internet were not of much help (As I got to know later). You will know that a Wrong Turn can have mad consequences, if you have seen this movie. But thankfully I was able to avoid taking such turns on the way to Bhandardara. In fact I felt like Magellan or Columbus, on an adventure into uncharted roads. Going boldly where man has gone before but not posted an article about it on the internet! Bhandardara – The final frontier! Yeah, gave me goose bumps too!

Here is a turn by turn guide to driving from Pune to Bhandardara.

1. Take the Pune – Nasik Highway (NH 50). Drive. Drive. Drive.
2. Cross Narayangaon on the way. There is a charming restaurant by the name of Ivy Lounge just outside Narayangaon. You may choose to break here and pick up a bottle of wine. Then Drive. Again. Yes.
3. Note that the scenery is breathtaking. We, Indians tend to get caught up in the driving.
4. Drive till you reach Sangamner. About 150 kms from Pune. This is a dusty, crowded small town, not much different from a host of other dusty, crowded small towns.
5. Take a left just after crossing the ST bus stand. Take another left turn at the next junction. Drive, drive till you reach Akola.
6. Drive on till you reach Rajur. I guess this is where you will start seeing signboards showing you the way to Bhandardara.
7. From Rajur to Bhandardara is another 20 odd kms. The drive becomes better as you near Bhandardara.
8. There is a left turn (Well marked) which takes you to the MTDC or Anandvan resort.

Enjoy Bhandardara. In case you feel the need to thank me, send me an email, and I will take it from there.

More Quips on the go!

President Musharraf has admitted to ISI’s links with the terrorists. Now that he is no longer consequential this did not become a news item!

I did not quite get this article. I mean is it trying to say that the newly elected and married MP does not have time to go on a honeymoon OR is it saying their 5-year honeymoon starts now?

Sheetal Mafatlal has been detained for carrying a Crore’s worth of undeclared diamonds. Officials became suspicious when all the other passengers on the flight were wearing shades, that too in the middle of the night!

It’s raining laptops in Tamil Nadu now. Cut to 2050. It will be raining luxury yachts and private jets. I am settling in Chennai. Who cares for actual rain!

Apple just launched the iPhone 3GS. It has a whole new set of drool-worthy features. Those who just bought the iPhone 3G, try not to punch a wall or something.

Apple also reduced the prices of the old 3G iPhone model to $99. Consumers in India will be able to buy one from Airtel or Vodafone at $600. Consumers in India, try not to punch a wall or something!

Australia knocked out of the T20 World Cup. Ricky Ponting will captain Kolkata Knight Riders in IPL 3. I am sure Kolkata Knight Riders will do better in IPL 3. I may be an optimist, but I am definitely not mad!